"She is at it again" I heard yesterday... and yet despite the nasty email of discouragement I still said, YES YOU BET I AM! Strangely though I changed my mind last night... this email got to me a little more than normal and facebook did too.
Now, I thought about handling this two ways...
1. just post the competition and get on with it anyway...
Or
2. Give you a little insight into why I am here, why LPP is here and why I host these little fundraisers in the first place.So if you have the time I invite you to read on. Its a very raw, raw piece but I will try to keep it limited xx
Number 2 won... so here it is
Ok, so as most of you know I am mummy to little Chiara. V Cute Huh!!!
Our little spark with a strong personality and dynamic character. Our little 3.5 year old is Type 1 diabetic. It is not who she is. It does not define her. But, it is just a little extra thing we need to do every day, no every hour, no actually every minute almost... days and nights.
So here's the thing, in our team of specialists we have our friendly Psychologist... a wise man who gave me a good piece of advice that I hold onto every day. "Renee, You must not be the mother. You must be the teacher you are trained to be. Put yourself in robot mode do what needs to be done in order to keep your daughter alive. If you dont, she will die". Ok harsh much??.... You bet! But did it do the trick... yes, to a degree it did. Those words echo in my head constantly. I do what I have to do. I be what I need to be when I need to be it, whenever I need to be, no matter what else pops up. This is hard for others to fathom, and they may not ever, but for me it is how it is. I might not tell anyone... (even though, technically i am about to)... but the daily struggle of being a carer of a toddler with T1D is constantly intense and heartbreaking. You will never know the full degree unless you live it.
Anyway, this brings me to
La Petite Princesse. A place that has evolved into so many different new spaces. I have loved it immensely, as it is a little avenue to create, play and just dabble in something that is fun. It gives me joy to create little pretties for you, Kikki and her BFF's. It's fun because it is something that Chaira has always helped me with in one way or another.
(oh baby cuteness choosing Princesse Clips at 1yr and 4 months, how sweet are you!!!!
Its also fun because, thanks to daddy /Hubby Paulie, who works long hours and days, I am able to do this with Chiara...at home. I am able to converese with so many beautiful and amazing people, who quite amazingly have become my friends. I can't tell you how many wonderful people I now call my friend...thanks to Facebook. (never thought i would say that! ) But with that also comes the flip side..... Facebook has made things a little harder with their lack of 'post showing' which makes businesses feel the need to push. Initially, I really wanted the boutique. I wanted the amazing success....
wanted being the operative word. It also opens the door to people who dont believe a "clip maker " should push charity where charity is not required. SAYS WHO?
For those of you who have been with us long enough, know I have said this before.... I WONT PUSH our posts. I dont like it and I wont do it. Sadly for me, it means that we are not as seen as what I would have once hoped...there wont be a boutique and their wont be a billboard in New York or Paris featuring LPP...but for the amazing glittery silver lining...it opened the door to being mummy again.
As an early Childhood teacher, I had hoped to return this year. Sadly with the ups and downs that we face with Chiara's health , I couldnt. So I tried a tutoring role with a little company. Sadly first day in... I had to quit...called to an emergency with Chiara and had her home with me for the next two weeks. I can't do that to employers and I cant do that to my reputation as a teacher! See, its not as black and white as it appears to be. Its not a cold, I cant treat it with panadol. If she is sick she has to be watched like STING on stage at the Opera House. (and believe me .. your eyes don't leave that stage, damn he is good! ) It can change at the drop of a hat or she will end up back in hospital...again. no thanks.
So, I am back to...
"she is posting more comps".... "you make clips you do not save the world"... "dont think you are special" yes, these were the words I heard today.... so darling lady, to this i say...
I then made the decision to cancel the competition.
I am not quite sure which direction these charitable ideas will take now, I wont stop but there just has to be a better way.
Trying to create things that a quirky and fun just dont seem to reach anyone.
One thing I do know for sure ... there has got to be a better way to try to raise money for all of the beautiful little people affected by this awful awful chronic illness.....
I just have to find a new way that doesn't break my heart doing so!
To you all I wish you a beautiful day or night as always... filled with lots of love and smiles...and remember
Don't let anyone dull your sparkle... I'll try if you will xx
love you
Ren
xxxx
have totally loved your messages and emails of support...thank you xx
We look forward to sharing our next collection with you soon...
